Retrace
by endlessXbliss
Summary: **ONESHOT** What if Rick still hadn't realized he loved Lisa even after she confessed and the big battle ended?


My first songfic ever. Let me warn you before you continue on: this is not for the hopeless non-romantics.  
The song is Retrace by Anberlin. I wish the song went a little more slowly and had a more calming tone (which is why I recommend the acoustic version), but what I _really _like are the lyrics.  
Before anything else, I am going to say that I do NOT own anything. Not Robotech, not this song, not the band. Nothing. Nada. (Except for the idea of the story, of course, which in anyway I am not gaining any monetary profits from; this is just for fun.)  
Errors are on me, like always.  
Anyways.... here it is:

* * *

The battle had ended, and it seemed like it had been forever. However, it had only been days since the SDF-2 had fallen, and its predecessor, the legendary SDF-1, had risen and protected the Earth once again. It had only been days since Khyron had been defeated, but defeated with a heavy prize. It had only been days since Minmay had offered him a normal, ordinary life. It had only been days since Lisa had told him that she loved him.

_Lisa._ He heard she had been promoted to Admiral, loading herself with work. He wouldn't exactly know; they haven't seen each other since the day of the battle. They haven't had the chance, though neither would've made an effort to see each other even if they were given such opportunity. _I wonder how she's doing…_ That was the curious thought that ran through his head as he walked along the sidewalk, finally heading home after a long, strenuous day. He had just returned from South America. Khyron's base was found, and subsequently, he was ordered to investigate. He couldn't help but want to go back there, to stay there and forget the recent attacks of devastation in New Macross, including the death of great, beloved friends and allies. Still, Macross was home, and there was something—someone—that impelled him to return.

_Oh, how I've tried  
To get you out of my head  
And I lie with broken words I said  
Never thought I'd walk on this street again  
Standing where it all began_

_Tried to forget  
When I left this town  
Well it takes me right back  
When I come back around_

_Retrace  
The steps we took on that long summer night  
I'm back there by your side  
Retrace  
The steps we took when we met worlds away  
Counting backwards while the stars are falling_

It was a windy day, reminding him of when Lisa had left him after the disastrous picnic. He winced, recalling how much of a jerk he had acted.

All around as he walked and remembered, citizens finished their last efforts of reconstruction for the day. However, as he thought more and more of her, the more the knowledge that they were even there flowed away.

He continued sauntering, and when he had arrived home, his feet immediately made their way to his bedroom. His body collapsed on the bed, his back facing the ceiling. He turned his head sideways to make himself more comfortable and then closed his eyes. He was so tired.

But despite this state, he found himself only seeing Lisa's face. How odd it was that when he had first met her—when he had called her old sourpuss after she had yelled at him—he wanted her to go away. But now that she had left, he felt… empty.

He missed her, he knew that much.

_Oh now I find  
Every subtle thing screams your name  
It reminds me of places and times we've shared  
Couldn't live locked in these memories  
Now I'm chained to my thoughts again_

_And I tried to forget  
When I left this town  
But I'll take you right back  
If you come back around_

_Retrace  
The steps we took on that long summer night  
I'm back there by your side  
Retrace  
The steps we took when we met worlds away  
Counting backwards while the stars are falling_

He made himself believe that he should stop thinking about her, and he forcefully opened his eyes. He spotted his photo album, and his hands reached to grab it. Now sitting, he flipped through the pages. Sheet after sheet of Minmay's pictures. He recalled their conversation after the fighting had ended.

"_Rick, I've finally realized it. The two of us… we don't really fit. "_

"_But Minmay—"_

"_No, Rick."_

"_I didn't run after her, so why are you leaving?"_

"_Rick, maybe you really don't love her, but you have your military and I have my singing. My songs mean more to me than I thought. Don't we both know that though we can try, we can't succeed from separating from these things that are very important to us?"_

_Rick looked down. She was undeniably right._

"_When Lisa came to our house, and said those things to me, she reminded me of my duty to be an inspiration to the people, and when you forced me to agree to let you fight, it told me that I had been completely selfish, Rick. So I'm going back to where I should be. I'm going to keep singing." A silent moment ensued. "Don't forget me, Rick. You have to promise you won't."_

_Rick gave a slight nod. "I will. I promise."_

_She smiled, told him "I really have to go now," and reached to give him a small peck on the cheek. "Goodbye, Rick. Goodbye." she said as she ran outside. Suddenly, she stopped, turned around, and waved. Rick gestured back and saw her walk further away._

She was gone for good, but he didn't feel as sad as he had assumed he would be. The two years _had_ drifted them apart.

He turned the page again and finally arrived at the pictures of Lisa. A bigger, better reason than the gap for not being so melancholy was, he now began to believe, because he felt a bigger loss. It left him bewildered that though death had taken some great friends _and _though the songbird flew away never to return, his mind was much more occupied over the thought that Lisa was now gone and was moving on. Farewells of others did not agonizingly pierce his heart as much as the valediction of the woman he loved.

_I need some shelter  
I need some safety_

_Photographs they  
Haunt me lately  
Chasing shadows  
As the evening takes me  
I'm still searching but the picture's fading_

_Retrace  
The steps we took  
On that long summer night  
I'm back there by your side_

_Retrace  
The steps we took  
When we met worlds away  
Counting backwards  
Still counting backwards_

_And nowhere else has ever felt  
Like home  
And I can't fall asleep  
When I'm lying here alone  
I replay your voice  
It's like you're here  
You move the earth  
But now the sky is falling_

Love? Love! That was it! How could he have been so stupid as to not realize it till now? He was, without a doubt, completely in love with Lisa Hayes.

With this new understanding, he immediately ascended from his bed and ran towards the all-too familiar house, despite his already heavy exhaustion.

When he reached his destination, he was completely out-of-breath. He was shaking, and his body was screaming for a bed. But that didn't matter now; he needed to talk to her.

He walked towards her door, but the lights were off. _Is she asleep?_ He rang the doorbell. "Lisa?" No answer. He rang it again and knocked. Still no answer. He began to powerfully bang the door. Again, no answer. Not even a light or two switching on. _Maybe, she's too tired._

_No. I need to talk to her. Maybe she is tired, but she needs to listen to what I have to say._ At last, he opened the door with the combination Lisa had given him. As soon as he stepped in, he turned the lights on, and the fading of darkness revealed a vacant residence.

Suddenly, he spotted a picture frame lying on the floor. He picked it up. It was a picture of them together, with one arm wrapped around her shoulder, while the other poked her cheek. She was blushing. Rick chuckled as he remembered the time the photo was taken. It was a few days after Lisa had given him her pictures. It was a lovely summer day, a great comparison to the harsh windy days lately. They were talking and walking together after work, as was their usual routine. Rick mentioned the pictures and how photogenic she was. She began to blush, and he was having too much fun teasing her—he was rarely given the chance to do so. Wanting to push a little more, he told Lisa he'd prove it to her, and called one of the talking cameras that walked around the city.

Tears beginning to moisten his eyes, he sighed and held onto the frame tighter._ Why…? Why did I just now realize how much you really mean to me? Why now? And why did you leave? Didn't you say you'd always love me? Where are you?_

_Retrace  
The steps we took  
On that long summer night  
In my mind I'm back by your side_

_Retrace  
The steps we took  
When we met worlds away  
Counting backwards while the stars are falling_

"Why is the front door open? And the lights are on…?" he suddenly heard from the front door. "Hello?" The familiar voice called. _Could it be?!_

"Rick?" He turned around and saw her. She was shocked to see him there, standing and clutching the picture frame. As he stared, he made a mental note to spank himself for not realizing he was in love with this woman, this oh-so beautiful woman.

At the shock, the frame slipped from his fingers. As he kept staring, he couldn't help but run over to her and hug her, tight and secure.

She almost choked. Nevertheless, she was worried about him, especially as she noticed his moist eyes. "Rick? What's wrong?"

He closed his eyes, and a tear trickled on his cheek. "I missed you so much." _No more holding back_ he thought.

Then, Lisa pushed him away, releasing herself. Her expression grew restrained, and she gave him a forlorn smile accompanied by visible tears that threatened to fall. "Rick, please… don't…" Her head dropped and she stared at the floor.

"I love you!" She raised her head again, looking at him confusedly shocked. His hands cupped her delicate face. "I love you. I'm sorry I only realized it now. Please… please… whatever you do… please don't leave me." His tone, his expression—all of him—gave Lisa no room to doubt his words.

_Is this a dream? _Tears ran down her cheeks as she embraced him with need, with love.

The salt water from her eyes dampened his shirt, but he couldn't care less. He was just glad that she was finally in his arms.

"I love you too."

He lightly pulled away and landed his lips on hers. A passionate kiss ensued, one full of relief, happiness, and most importantly, love.

They stopped, suffering the need for air, and then, he took her in his arms again.

"Looks like I've got to give Max even more thanks."

"Huh?"

"He's in charge of my security." She sighed and continued, "The RDF is being a little too overprotective these days. It's the loss of all the high officials after Khyron's attack, and they're afraid that they might lose more if they're not careful. They won't let anyone get near me without drastic measures. Of course, upkeeping these measures included new living quarters. I can't even tell anyone where I leave. Of all things, the movers forgot the picture. I kept telling myself to forget about it, about you, but in the end I just… couldn't. The movers were convinced that they left nothing, so I told them I was going to get it myself. I had to ask for Max's help to sneak out though."

He smiled. "Maybe we can give him a promotion; he deserves it even if he didn't help us."

"We can. We should."

"Congratulations on _your_ promotion, by the way. Though this is probably the first time I've heard of an admiral sneaking out."

"I'm not even sure that was a great decision. I feel like I'm trying on one of my father's uniforms."

"You kidding me? No one deserves it more than you do."

"Maybe, but I want to forget about work right now."

He nodded. "I'm always so tired, but I bet it's been even more exhausting for you."

"So you better watch your back. I bet they're going to promote _you_ soon."

"Oh, no please not me. Heaven forbid that a cocky, dense jet jockey like me be promoted to a respected admiral."

"You deserve it too, you know."

"Whatever happened to the not-talk-about-work agreement you suggested?"

"You can't escape it fore—"

Before she could say anything, his lips caught hers.

"Maybe I can't… but for now, we both have better things to spend our time with than discussing this."

She smiled the warm smile he would never be able to get enough off and took his hands in hers. "You're right." she agreed.

The two began to walk out of the quarters. As they reached the exit, they both took a final glance of the room, switched the lights off, and finally close the door.

The battle _had_ ended, but the obvious fact that there were more to come lingered in their minds. Did it matter? Yes, but at least they had each other, and that alone gave them enough strength to go to the stars and beyond.

_The End_

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Hope that was worth your time. Thanks for reading; hope you're kind enough to review. (Shoot, and say what you have to say. Flames or not, go ahead.)


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